I have been highly influenced by THIS BLOGGER recently. She has inspired me to
change some of my bad habits and focus more on the things that matter most.
I don't know about you, but for me being a stay at home mom I sometimes let myself get stuck in a rut.
I know I should do this or that... fill in your own blank... but I decide that it can be put off until tomorrow. Well tomorrow has turned into weeks and months of putting off the most basic of things...
like getting Ellie's room organized and decorated, or re-teaching her the ABC's
because she forgot them due to us not practicing enough.
Or putting away winter clothes.
Or sweeping out the garage.
Or doing daily scripture study.
Or making dinner menu's for the week.
Or organizing my book case.
Or praying with my kids each night.
Or learning new photography techniques.
Or serving a friend.
Or... you get it.
I know that I am not living up to my mothering potential, or just my own expectations for myself.
My days are being wasted, and that is not ok with me. I want to form good habits
so that when we add kid #3 and kid #4 to our family, I am not completely swamped trying to keep up.
If I can form the habit now, then when I add a couple more children to the mix,
I feel the transition will be smoother. Besides that, organization and cleanliness
are good for my spirit. It is past time to make a huge change. My plan?
I have come up with a list of what I call my "Non-negotiables".
so that when we add kid #3 and kid #4 to our family, I am not completely swamped trying to keep up.
If I can form the habit now, then when I add a couple more children to the mix,
I feel the transition will be smoother. Besides that, organization and cleanliness
are good for my spirit. It is past time to make a huge change. My plan?
I have come up with a list of what I call my "Non-negotiables".
This is part daily schedule, part goal sheet for each day.
They are the things that I plan to do every day.
Non-negotiable.
Have to do them!
Be out of bed by 7am. NO MATTER WHAT!
Do personal prayer/scripture/journal time for at least 20 minutes each morning, first thing if possible, or before 8:30am.
Be dressed with hair and make up done by 8:30am.
Spend at least one hour of one-on-one time with Ellie each day.
*This time can be broken up into chunks.
Some ideas are:
reading books
going on walks or riding her bike
doing a craft
working on letters or ABC's
teaching her how to write her name
playing with play dough
Work on at least one deep cleaning project daily. It doesn't have to be finished that day,
but I need to work on it for at least 30 minutes.
Do dinner dishes directly after dinner, or if that's not possible,
then before I have any nightly relax time.
Pray with Ellie before bed time.
Pick up and put away the main areas of the house before going to bed.
Let's be honest...
There will be days where I fail miserably.
But I think overall this will make me a better mom and help me to
feel better about myself and more comfortable in our home.
"We become who we
want to be by
consistently being who
we want to become
each day."
-Richard G Scott
What are your daily or weekly goals? I would love to hear what helps other moms to be productive. Please share your tips with the rest of us!!!
12 comments:
You're awesome Erin! We started doing nightly prayer about a year ago, now our boys remind us and it makes for an easier bedtime routine. The boys know that it's bathtime, teethtime, prayer time, then hugs and kisses. since being pregnant, my daily 'fun' time has not been as fun but establishing somewhat of a routine BEFORE i got pregnant with #3 has made things easier. Good Luck! Happy WIFE, Happy LIFE!
Erin, this made me cry. A good cry, of course. It's nice to know that someone else feels the same way I do! It's also nice to know that I am not the only one who needs to be better! Good luck with your goals, they look great!
My list that I made (SERIOUSLY LAST NIGHT!!!!) looks ridiculously similar- except the wake up at 7. It should be there, but isn't : )
I also have spend 1 on 1 time with Tucker as well as Kerrigan, go to the gym at least 3 times a week and make sure I leave Tucker with someone else once a week (getting way too mama boy-esk) and Kerrigan plays with a friend twice a week.
Also, LOVE the quote...it might appear on my mirror in the next few days so I can read it everyday!
Love this post! We can ALL do better and we all fail sometimes. Nobody is perfect. It's great to start out simple so you don't get over whelmed. My advice would be to have a FHE on prayers and scrpiture study. Buy Ellie her own small Book of Mormon to have by her bed. Tell her what you want to do "We are going to read a verse every night and say our prayers." Ask her to help you remember...my kids have to remind me sometimes. Have her repeat a few words at a time and read a verse or two every night...Cami loves to "read" the scriptures and thinks it fun! So yeah...have an FHE about all your goals, so everyone knows what's expected and you're not the only one trying to remember to do them.
Lindsey, great ideas. I should put one on one time with McCoy too, but I spend so much stinkin time feeding and cleaning and rocking that boy, that it counts for me.
Thanks for the suggestions Laura! That's a great idea about the FHE.
I am so on the same page as you. I have been doing weekly goals, as to not overwhelm myself all at once. Last week is was get up at 7 and read scriptures, this week I added make a healthy breakfast for my kids every day. No more cold cereal in the mornings. So far so good. I will add something new next week. I am glad I am not the only one who feels the way you do.
Aw, your such a good mama and person. It made me get up and get going for the day! Oh and I use huggies...it was just a highly explosive poop. I love the huggies...that happened all the time with pampers.
Erin, you never cease to amaze me. I admire your honesty and candor about your situation. We are all in the same boat. We all struggle in some area or another. Little do you know how many of us look up to you and wish we were more like you :).
I think as mom's we all sometimes fail to stop and enjoy our times as moms. I've told you this before, I get stressed about a clean house but I severely fail to just enjoy my kids and allow them to be kids. I get frustrated so fast at times with my kids but I just need to take a step back and realize that these are precious moments that will be gone all too fast. We all feel the pressure of being the best mom we can and its so awesome to have these goals. You definitely have encouraged me to be better at being a mom and spending more time teaching my kids. Get Ellie involved for sure in your goals. Maybe even make a schedule and tell her in the mornings we will work on your ABC's and a craft. Then let her know the schedule or norm is to do scriptures and prayers every night before bed. She'll be excited to remind you. Kids are great that way.
Just another idea to add to your list :) Its similar to what Lindsey was saying. We started date nights with our kids. Once a month each kid gets a date with either mom or dad and it switches off, but they get to pick some activity to do just with them. Its a really special time with just them that I have even come to look forward to and treasure. It doesn't need to be anything huge but even going grocery shopping but allowing them to put things in the basket or pick a special treat or go for a bike ride with just them. Something special. Just another idea :) Good luck!!
Wow great posts. I love it when you read a blog and its actually based on the realities of life instead of la la land. I'm in the same boat except I'm two months from having my third! Flylady.net has really helped me get my house in order. It has turned my thinking around too, instead of those negative voices of telling myself what I didn't do I tell myself the postive things I did do, even if it is small...like brushing teeth. I have to fight it constantly but i'm much happier. I too get so overwhelmed at the house duties that I overlook spending quality time with my kids and they are the most important thing anyway. I know that laundry will always be there but someone still has to clean it, its just a big balancing game. Great post.
I am SO glad that I am not the only one who feels like this! You inspire me E! It is amazing how much better the day is for me when I wake up right when Jeremy leaves for work, and I have a chance to do some scripture study and shower and get ready for the day before the kiddos wake up! The kids are happier and I, surprisingly enough have tons more energy! Dinner dishes are the worst, but it is feels SO good to wake up to a clean kitchen! Way to go Erin! Those are great goals!!! You have got me pumped up to do better! Love ya!
I have been feeling pretty rotten about myself lately so I've made a few changes. I spent money on a haircut AND. paid to have it styled. We've begun having dinner at the kitchen table EVERY night and a prayer first...something simple, but we've neglected to do it. I've also started the couponing craze. It takes time but it makes me feel good to save money. Its like getting a paycheck because I'm contributing monetarily. I also left both kids with my mom to do our out of town shopping trip.it took several hours, but the trip was so much less stressful and I enjoyed just being with Trevor!
Your blog is so refreshing to read!! I love being able to talk "real" talk with you!! Thanks for being such a dear sweet friend! You are amazing!! Luv ya much!!! I never thought getting organized and putting those "mommy moments" into perspective could be so fun!! Thanks for helping me' see the simpler things as the most important things! Your the best!!
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